#26 The Power Of Intrinsic Pleasure — Bjarte Hiley


Intrinsic pleasure is the alignment of life force when you´re at rest with yourself letting everything take care of itself from there.

WATCH Episode #26: The Power Of Intrinsic Pleasure with Bjarte Hiley




"This sounds good, but how?", quite a few of you asked me in private messages after I posted this. That's a damn good question.
"Ground your actions in what you most deeply want to do, and you'll never have problems with your will power again."
This sentence hides a lot of depth which could do with some unpacking. Maybe in some sort of oversimplified yet satisfying step-by-step process?
Yes, let's try that.
Ground your actions in what you most deeply want in 17 simple steps:
1. You are either perpetually busy and proud of it, or feel a sense of shame and meaninglessness when not keeping yourself occupied (may look like boredom from the surface). They disguise an experience of unworthiness.
2. You receive a sign that it is not you who is unworthy, but that the unworthiness you experience is merely an identity you've assumed due to developmental imprints and circumstances you are no longer compatible with.
3. You attempt to just stop feeling unworthy. You fail miserably, resulting in further unworthiness.
4. At some point you discover a method which supports you in getting closer to the feeling without reenforcing the mental groove of unworthiness.
5. You learn how to witness the process you go through when you get triggered without reenforcing it. You stop trying to change it.
6. You notice and take inventory of all the maladaptive coping strategies you've developed, both the habits of thought and the habits of behaviour.
7. You judge yourself for having such terrible coping strategies, and fall into unworthiness yet again.
8. You gradually get in touch with the pain underneath your unworthiness, either by yourself or with the help of someone modelling how to be with the feeling without changing it or collapsing into it.
9. You deeply realise that the unworthiness is in itself a coping strategy to deal with pain which was unbearable to a younger version of you.
10. You develop a deep self-compassion and patience with yourself and the time you need to unravel the wounding.
11. As you discover your triggers, get closer to the visceral experience of them, and feel the result of your coping strategies without trying to change them (which is another coping strategy), you'll slowly find that the impulses/cravings to engage with them subside
12. You start to recognise the deeper needs and wants which your coping strategies were attempts at meeting.
13. You might feel fear and terror at the possibility of those needs being met. You oscillate between experimenting with getting your real needs met, and indulging in your coping strategies. You are no longer using will-power to keep the coping strategies at bay, but are rather using the moments you indulge in the coping strategies as learning opportunities to rewire your desire for them through feeling how they affect you.
14. If the coping strategy is not aligned with your path and what you most deeply want, it will start to feel less attractive when you approach it in the above mentioned way.
15. You'll start to experience more moments of genuine satisfaction and contentment, and you'll be in a positive upwards spiral.
16. You start to trust that will-power is not needed in order to achieve what you want. Once you're no longer in resistance to what you want, the movement towards it begins to accelerate on its own accord, through self-love and the true meaning of self-discipline: Lovingly adhering to your souls calling.
17. Most of your days will be spent returning to rest in yourself, making the steps towards sustaining yourself, and contributing to the world deemed right by your inner guidance. You will experience moments of resistance to this occasionally, and will apply the process described above as appopriate when necessary, and with lessening resistance. Deepening and deepening every day.
TL;DR: Grant yourself self-love and trust, and let it infuse your whole life. 


About Bjarte Hiley

Bjarte Hiley is a specialist at facilitating the transformation of peoples relationships to themselves and life through movement.

He is the founder of Daomove, a method he developed to invite people into a deeper contact with their embodied experience, and let themselves be moved into bold action from that place.


What´s Next?

Go to The Sensual Sessions Podcast Episode #27: Sensual Intimacy

Learn more with resources on: Bodymind Philosophy

Discover: Ecstatic Breathing Practice